Chris L'Esperance
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist #114845
Offering online therapy services for
Santa Cruz and San Luis Obispo County Residents.
Teen Therapy:
Are you worried about the mental health of your teenager?
Parents of teenage children often become concerned when they begin to notice changes in their child’s behavior or emotional wellbeing. This may take the form of withdrawing from family or friends or angry outbursts at home or in school. Parents may also be concerned when they notice symptoms of anxiety and/or depression, a change in grades, or in other activities such as sports.
Adolescents may be dealing with issues like bullying, fitting in, identity development, performance anxiety, pressures at school or in sports, peer pressure, social anxiety and conflict at home. These issues may lead to changes in behavior and/or to an increase in anxiety or depression symptoms. In addition, teenagers growing up in today’s world are confronted with the influence of social media and access to news and other stimulating material, which can be overwhelming, stressful and confusing for a developing mind. Through my experience working with teens, I have developed a better understanding of the challenges teens face and how to provide the support they need. I will help you to identify areas of concern for your child and strategies to support them. We will also work toward fostering a high quality of connection between the you and your child.
My approach to working with teenage clients and their families in therapy:
Before becoming a licensed therapist, I worked with at risk youth and also volunteered as a high school rugby coach. Through this experience and my education and training as a therapist, I have come to understand the value of supporting the developmental process of the young people I work with. Adolescence serves as a transitional period of development between childhood and adulthood. During this time, young people begin to develop a self-concept that is independent of their parents. Teens typically want to be treated more like adults and yet still need the support and containment of their parents or guardians. These are normal aspects of the developmental process and yet they can also make a child’s teenage years hard on the teen and their family.
The approach I take to working with teens in therapy focuses on working with both the teen client and their parents or guardians to support healthy mental and emotional development as well as healthy relationships. I use this lens in addition to addressing the specific concerns, symptoms, or diagnoses that are relevant for each individual teen client and their family. I will work to support strong emotional connections between you and your teen. I will also help guide you in providing healthy limits and boundaries that will support the developmental process. This is important because these have proven to be building blocks of aiding young people in having as healthy of a developmental process through their crucial adolescent years as possible.
Anxiety and Depression in Teens:
Emotional challenges often arise during the adolescent years. There are a wide range of factors that may contribute to symptoms of anxiety and depression for anyone, teens included. One common theme I have observed in working with teens is that they are confronted with different and sometimes conflicting information and influences from parents, teachers, media, and peers while also trying to understand themselves in their world. This can lead to confusion, anxiety, and depression symptoms among other emotional challenges. I have found it to be important to help young people understand their own experience of anxiety and/or depression and equip them with the skills and strategies necessary for them to manage their own symptoms, ask for the help they need, and improve the quality of connection in their relationships.
What can I be doing to support my teen child?
Parents are sometimes unsure of how to best support their teen child in the emotional challenges that the teen is facing. “Should I be harder on them? Should I take it easier on them?” These questions are also important to address in therapy and are largely dependent on how the family functions and what the teen is needing. I will help you to first identify the specific concerns and needs of your child, and then will work with you to develop effective strategies for addressing them. This is one example of why it is important to have parents participate in their teens therapeutic process.
My child’s grades have started slipping and I’m worried, can therapy help with that?
School performance is a common reason parents bring their child in and can be a tricky subject to address in therapy. In alignment with the therapeutic process, it is critical that I support the goals and needs of the teen client and not impose an agenda onto them. With that said, my focus will be to help them address the reasons their grades may have dropped. If the change in school performance is related to emotional challenges, we will address these challenges by equipping your child with tools and strategies to empower them, and their grades may improve as a result.
For some teen clients, the pressure they feel to perform in school or in other activities may be a significant contributing factor to their anger, depression, or anxiety. I recognize the importance of education and fully support the intention of teaching kids a strong work ethic and encourage self-improvement. However, it is concerning when kids begin to feel devalued when they have a poor performance in school or in other areas. I want to help teens in building resiliency around their performances in school and activities. This will allow them to move forward with a focus on self-improvement that does not include feeling like a ‘loser’ if they get a bad grade on a test or have a bad game.